shades of life.. koi kush hai.. koi dukhi :|

hii

well.. what am i doing online?? its almost 3:00 am.. .. nothing.. its been a while .. i mean.. i dunno y . i have stopped comming online.. though im online almost all day.. but thats my computer which is online.. not me.. newayz.. im sittin here in my room at this time .. after like ages now.. it looks so gud.. :) the best thing about this room.. is the big window that it has.. not just 1.. 2 of em.. :) simply gr8 .. its low bedding.. and offcourse my computer.. just mine.. something i dun need to share with ne one.. :) and the worst thing about it is.. its next to my brothers room !! : ..and for the same reason i have been studin downstairs.. .. yeah !next to my mom&dads room is another room.. which is used for ironing clothes.. and nthin else.. mom n dad.. future planning.. mde that room for rachits children i guess :P .. hehe newayz.. have kinda shifted there.. that room isint as cute as this one.. no where in front of it.. but its kind of out of this world.. quiet.. peaceful.. u know its really sick .. when ur tryin to do some rc .. or di and good-for-nothing brother suddenly starts playin some metal number at full volume.. or when ur almost about to sleep and ur brother n his frnz just finished with or rather won some racing ..biker ..game on computer.. they cheer and forget about the world around them !! guyzzz r sick !!! and so is this room.. but this room down stairs.. is quiet .. and i cant hear my brothes loud music there.. feels gr8.. :) .. u get up in the mornin to see ur mom in front of u or ur best frn (dad) .. instead of a computer .. which says 'download over'.. or 'ur antivirus needs an update'.. or the face of a monster who lives in the next room !! GOD save his girlfriend(s)!! hehe ..this room isint gud at all.. just one rack where i keep by cat prep books (engg books !! huh!! ye kyaa hota hai ?? ) and there a bed.. oldest bed i guess.. hehe .. though it isisnt all that gud .. as mine here..upstairs.. but then who cares..nething to avoid the disturbance..my brother.. n my computer.. but why am i tryin so hard??? for what reason(s)?? i mean i tried my level best.. i dunno if this is my level best.. but i tried hard.. real hard.. i m nt gettin ne output.. i have taken so many mocks.. flts n all .. n screwd most of em.. : .. and when ppl such hi marks.. i just dun understand where am i wrong.. im sure its something with my strategy.. coz i do well in sectional tests.. : .. ok now just incast if theres n cat cracker readin this post..(which most of the time is.or are.. coz i get some comments form em)then dun laugh.. abhi im in very crazy and out of mind kinda mode.. and i have 2-3 loaded gunz next to me.. no no no no .. i wont shoot myself in frustration.. maar k hi marungi :D .. ok that was a pj .. i m sick at this also now.. !! huh !! mridu thankx for the advise.. really cat vo hi carck karta hai .. jo mid way frustrated ho k choor nahi deta.. :) ...!! :(( ma ma maaaaa!! this cat thing is gettin on my nerves now.. i wasnt ever seriouS about ne damn thing in my life .. seriously .. never.. i dunno how i ended up with this passion to crack cat.. and now not being able to crack it .. is killin me..i dunno whats wrong with me.. i drink eat sleep cat.. i have had gud dreams n sometimes nightmares realted to cat.. but what am i gettin out of it?? nothing.. ill have to join hcl it seems..may b nest year ill post from noida : .. :((

n manish !! thankx for that update dude.. ! .. ok what update?? ill tell ya!! manish ..this guy is doin exec mba frm iimC ..informed me 3 days bak.. that these guys had a discussion with this gr8 proff .. as to y the cat is gettin tuffer yer aftr year.. and he said.. if u think CAT 2004 was a shock.. ur mistaken.. cat 2005 is gonna be even more tough !! now.. while i was talkin to him .. 2 mins while he was tellin me how cat is gonna b more tuff.. and how his proff(who himself is from A ..)said that if he took this years CAT ppr ..he himself wouldnt b able to clack it .. like he did to get into A.. and how last years iimC cutoff was 99.68%ile..i was wonderin if its april fools day.. or ne such day.. coz so many shocks at the same time cant b true.. but his frn in the background was askin him if he informed me about the whole thing.. and when i heard her.. i realised that it was a true news.. :( .. maaann!! im dead ! what r there guys acc lookin for??? .. cat gettin tuffer.. !! huh !! gimmy licence to kill.. n im gonna kill u guys there makin the CAT ppr : x-( ..

i know cat is 2 months away.. i still have time.. and if its just about strategy.. then 2 months r more than sufficient.. but then its all about the state of mind also.. : every time i get a bad score..(which happens very often) i get back and explain myself.. "its ok nidhi.. cat isint the end ofthe world.. u have otherthings to fall back to..if not this year then next year.." and then after a day of down and out me.. i get down and analyse the ppr.. n then realise than next time im gonna correct this..that..not this.not that.. and the cycle repeats itself.. : .. how long?? its been a month of time mocks.. 3 cl mocks over.. 9 flts over.. !! im scared.. i dun wanna join a job.. coz i know im not gonna get this time again.. i m using it to the max.. then whers the problem ????is it really about luck.. coz i m doin my best.. n nt reapin nething.. : luck?? or smart work.. i guess the latter.. lets c.. inshaa allah .. i know ill make it.. ajj nahi to next year.. or is it this thought thats ruining the whole thing?? this diversion.. ki i still have something to fall back to.. : ..ppl say gettin recruited early is a blessin.. i say its a curse !! : or is it my lack of determination.. no.. it cant be that !! :

********just in case u have managed to reach here.. n ur still alive ..just in case ..if ur bored.. the next section can make u sleep :P about me and my college frnz.. and the infosys placement story :D**********

newayz.. today was infosys campus.. and as usual.. me and amrita were there to help our frnz.. the venue was L.N.C.T ..gud college.. LNCT n OIST r colleges of same level.. really gud.. and then come my college.. :) .. top 3 colleges here.. excludin the nit and gec ofcourse ;)) .. but all 3 get filled within 2-3 days of counselling .. u see we have 26 engg colleges here in bhopal itself :D .. and when ur college fills in 2 days.. on state level its gud.. :D hehe.. massaging my own ego.. coz this has been happening sine last 2 years only :D newayz.. i was there for khushboo and ankur .. :) .. what can i say??? same old dialogue.. khhushboo desver"ed" that job and so did ankur .. : they cudnt clear the written :( .. i m sad.. coz this was the last gud company .. after this.. the ones left r .. hexaware.. mdoc.. n all.. what can i say?? i was there .. thats all i cud have done : .. but seriously .. after these guys told us about the puzzles asked.. i suddenly realised ... hcl tech written stage was a piece of cake !! technical was easy.. and the apti was okish .. all cat anat types questns.. and english section was.. fill in the blanks .. sentence correction.. and 2infrentials.. 2 pjs hehe.. etc .. fun :) .. the gd/pi was gud..techniacal interview wasnt easy though.. i was grilled on programming..n compiler design.. while i was in 5th sem..and it was a 7th sem subject(i had done the portion earlier)..hhehe n my hr was fun !! ;) dun ask me how :D ..
but aaj ka infy ka ppr sunn k i think i shud thank GOD .. :) hehe saste me choor diaa.. :)

the gud news is.. shilpi.. yep the very same girl (hemat+shilpi)my best frnz girl friend.. :D and the one who is kinda killin herself with me.. in this cat prep.. :D .. got thru the campus.. :) i dun wanna take even .0000...0001% credit.. but she has been tellin every one that its coz of nidhi.. :D sun k accha laga :D .. ;) .. acc she cudnt make it thru tcs.. she screwd her HR there..and coz this was her last chance .. i kept tellin her in my sarcstic way.. ki tera kyaa hoga.. na cat .. na job.. i used to get gud kickin's everytime i said that.. :) ;) .. but it did pay off.. 14th i was there at her place.. funde pila ri thi.. HR k.. after all .. attitude ho to nidhi jaisa :D lol!!..manna some times im negetive.. parthats only when im on this blog..or whenim with myself..nahi to ask my frnz how confident i yam !! atleast they tink im am ! lol :D ;) nahi maatne.. im ultra kool :D .. nahi mante.. amrita ko bhi funde pilaye thi.. shilpi ko bhi.. dono placed hain :P ..;) .. nahi kiddin.. acc she and hemant is tellin every one ki nidhi k karan hi hr nikla hai job cahiye tonidhi se dosti karo :P .. the statement should be .. "rajesh jain" k karan HR nikla hai.. CL campus classes main this guy trained us.. and the PD sessions of CL .. simply WOOW !! this guy is superb.. simply mind blowing ! !! :) i wish i make it to some gud college.. then he'll train me .. for my GD/PI and thats gonna make me even better :) hehe !! nidhi jaisi koi nahi :D .. and when shilpi said i owe u a treat.. i was like wooow !! lol nahi not just wow.. naukri ki pehi salary kaisi rahe gi?? lol .. newayz.. n hemant kept tellin ppl.. ki nidhi se dosti kar le.. naukri pakka lag jaye gi :D .. hehe .. yess.. NIDHI IS LUCKY FOR SOO MANY PPL :p but not enough lucky for herself :( .. im happy for u shilpi.. im sad for u khushi n ankur .. n im 6 feet under for my performance :( dead!! .. am i made for such small things in life??? may b yess.. :

newayzzz.. shilpi mera cell de de plz.. :D ..i did expect u to return it tonight.. balance kaisa hai?? :-s ..baki refuel to ho hi jata hai cell .. and abb to naukri bhi lag gai hai :P par im happy it served u :) ;) .. kisi k to kaam aaya :D .. sms nahi padiyo :P .. koi fayada nahi abb bolne kaa :P and 'my folders' me to jaaiyo hi nahi .. what did i hear?? gai thi :o ... nahiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii :P ;) .. :P chal koi nahi.. mujhe treat de de .. fir dekhti hu tujhe.. pata hai im missin my cell fonee soo much.. 1 day w/o it.. :( .. vo bhi tere paas :O :P hehe !!

enuff of my tp !! its 3:30 .. ben typin sincelast 40 mins i guess.. yestday was a looong day.. i cant keep my eyes open nemore.. kal subhe JAVA class bhijana .. then college.. : .. :)

i m online at this time after ages.. :D .. and its coz of that .. ki im hearin a few birds chirpin at this time after ages.. :D ... :) it sounds so gud :) .. gnite world !! hope u have a gud day tommorrow.. :) im sure im nt gon a have one.. but i sure know how to smile :)
gnite.. sweetdreams.. :)
miss me.. :) i know u all will :D :P ;)
PEACE
nidhi